During my pregnancy I spent 14 weeks on bed rest. It was a long and isolated time. However, I was lucky that my doctor took me off bed rest a couple of months before my son was born. However, this is not the case for most moms who are on bed rest. So how do you host a baby shower for a bedridden mom?
There are many ways to do this, depending on the level of restrictions the new mom has. The first thing to do is find out what the limitations of it are. Also find out if she wants to shower now or would prefer to wait until after the baby is born.
If the mom-to-be is feeling sick or the baby may not survive, consider postponing the shower until after the baby is born. Otherwise, she can find a way to shower him and still comply with her restrictions.
Some moms who are on bed rest don’t have many restrictions. The doctor just doesn’t want them active. If mom can travel well and she’s not supposed to be active, you can give her a pretty normal shower with just a few modifications.
- Choose a place that is close to your home.
- Arrange for someone to drive you.
- Make sure there is a nice, comfortable place where you can sit or lie down. It should be right in the middle of everything, not in a back room. Designate a sofa for her or a comfortable recliner and make it a seat of honor.
- Make sure you have a place to put snacks and drinks and that someone is in charge of making sure you have everything you need.
- Keep the party in the same room as her. It’s okay to have snacks and drinks in another room, but encourage people to stay in the main room so the new mom can be a part of it all.
- Keep the party short. Most moms who have been on bed rest get tired faster than normal. Keep the shower to 1 or 2 hours so you don’t get too tired. It can probably give you a good idea of what his stamina is like these days.
- Find out if mom has dietary restrictions. If she does, try to prepare foods that she can eat and enjoy.
- If you’re playing games, consider paper-and-pencil games or other things the new mom can participate in, or skip the games altogether and let her enjoy time with her friends.
- Have a designated helper be in charge of delivering the new mom her gifts and then, once they’re unwrapped, hide them away from her. Too much bending down to receive gifts and leaving them is a very bad idea for a bedridden mother.
- If people don’t know she’s on bed rest, you might want to include a little note in the envelope with the invitation to let guests know she’s on bed rest and has some restrictions, but is looking forward to seeing them. . .
- Ask the new mom to clean the shower with the doctor. Most doctors recognize the importance of these events and will tell you what is okay and what is not. Then everyone can rest easy knowing that she is safe.
If the new mom can’t travel, you’ll need to host the baby shower at her home. It would look a lot like the shower discussed above, with a few more things to consider.
- Make sure the new mom can go to bed during the party, without leaving the room. If she can’t travel, her doctor probably won’t want her to sit for long either.
- Arrange for someone to clean your house thoroughly before you shower. Remember, she CANNOT clean it. You don’t want her to stress about having guests over when her house looks less than the best. Plus, you’ll love having her house nice and clean.
- Make sure you leave the house totally clean, all trash is clean, and it looks as good or better than it did before you arrived. Bed rest is stressful for the whole family, don’t leave a mess for your husband to clean up, he probably already has his hands full trying to keep up with daily life.
Sometimes a new mom can’t stand having guests around her, she’s in the hospital, or for some other reason, she can’t be in the shower. If that’s the case, consider throwing a mini pampering shower for mom. Have 2 or 3 close friends get together, give her her gifts and just keep her company. Even most hospitals will allow it. Then, once the baby arrives and you’re home, you can consider throwing him a full baby shower.
The final option would be to take a shower like you would someone out of town. Sometimes a new mom who has been on bed rest (and therefore not working) really needs extra help getting even the basics for baby. If that’s the case, throw her a long-distance baby shower. Use webcams to connect her with everyone and bring her gifts. It’s not the same, but she will make her feel special and help her get what she needs before the baby is born.
Whatever method you choose to organize your shower, make sure it does. Many moms have missed baby showers because they were on bed rest. Don’t let your friend become one of them.