Since time immemorial, human beings have acted and reacted to relationships in a way that reflects their mind and mindset. He sways and sways showing a deep apathy and dismissive attitude and also benign and kind. The severity of their behavior is subject to the type of relationship they are exposed to inside and outside the parameters of human dwellings. Of course, the relationship between people, whether close or distant, has its impact both spiritually and materially.
The Psychology-Today specifies that while the human need for connection seems to be innate, the ability to form healthy, loving relationships is learned. It is further emphasized that relationships are not destiny, but are theorized to establish deeply ingrained patterns of relating to others.
Imam Khomeini (RA) said that “The most dangerous and staunchest enemy of the human being is the ‘I’. No other enemy is more harmful than this enemy..” It is important that people delve into this concept and develop constructive and significant results for their own benefit and that of society.
The multidimensional stretching relationship also varies in its degree of importance between any two people. What conspires and transpires between people again oscillates between spiritual and material concepts. The most important and coveted relationship is between parents and children. The biological relationship between them is deeply rooted in nature. But their journey from conception to birth and beyond to reaching a climax when death do them part has a story. It is important and essential to understand the mercy of Creation and its impact on human beings.
These relationships are deeply woven like the warp and woof of a cloth, but come with their own pitfalls as time passes. It is said that the end of a relationship is often a great source of psychological distress. Furthermore, it is essentially an integral part of human existence. However, the coexistence of human principles and values are driven by the force that is part of creational reality.
The Holy Qur’an says in Chater-17 Ayat #23: “The Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him, and (show) kindness towards parents. If one or both of them grow old with you, say no Fie Ie Uf-It is an Arabic word, do not reject them, but speak a word of grace to them”.
Although the influence of environments, cultures and society have played a dominant role, humans have not realized and do not take corrective measures to counter the undesirable impacts on their daily lives. The end result will be the birth of unhealthy relationships and derogatory behaviors between people.
There are two sides to this relationship. It is a roller coaster that reflects the merry-go-round of feelings and feelings between parents and children. The flip side is how these relationships progressed and stayed or went downhill is a point to ponder. The bond between parents and children is unique and exemplary. It is a gift of nature. Poor me! This gift is gradually losing value, so the warmth between parents and children is gradually taking refuge in cold storage. In the early fifties, this relationship based on materialistic attachment has taken its toll. Since then the drift has been in the desert of chaos and confusion.
But if it is based on spiritualistic values, then every moment is memorable and deep in its concept and values. The environment has its impact on others as well as leaving traces in the minds of the people around it. If you become materialistic, then the whole concept will become meaningless. The relationship plummets into the desert of unpleasantness and misery. The agony and pain that the parents will feel will be unimaginable. Children like it too, but they will never feel it at first.
Little by little, the guilt will haunt them until the end. This is the nature that has taken root in creation, yet arrogance and flippant attitude persist ignoring conscious warning. It eventually culminates in the finale, which will be a disaster of a larger magnitude. At this time the parents become a burden to the children and all principles become superfluous and values are relegated to the lowest possible level.
Children forget the pure and sincere love and affection of parents towards them. They believe that old age has made them redundant. They have plunged headlong into the materialistic world trying to acquire wealth, position, status and all the comforts and had no time to care for their elderly, sick or disabled parents. Finally they are transferred to rehabilitation centers. Their visits to nursing homes or rehab centers gradually wane and finally decrease until sad news reaches them that their parents are no longer in this world.
It is appropriate to quote Longfellow’s stanza from the Psalm of Life:
The lives of great men remind us
We can make our lives sublime,
And, leaving, leaving us behind
Footprints in the sands of time.