Getting pregnant is much more difficult than you expected, and you have been through a lot of anxiety and heartache. Stay strong, I have been in your place and there is still hope to start or expand your family! If you are seriously considering gestational surrogacy, here is a checklist to help you get started.
1. Confirm that gestational surrogacy is right for you.
Before putting a check mark next to this statement, think carefully. Have you done a thorough research on the surrogacy process and all the steps and people involved? Does your partner or spouse agree with the decision to find a surrogate mother? In your heart, do you think this is the right move for your family? If so, you can mark n. 1.
2. Find an attorney.
This is the step that many future parents overlook, until something goes wrong. Find a Maryland attorney with experience in assisted reproduction and the laws that relate to it. You will need a good reproductive attorney as part of your support team to review the clinic forms, write the surrogacy agreement, or prepare a birth order.
3. Contact a surrogacy agency and fertility clinic.
Now is the time to take the next step and contact a local surrogacy agency or IVF clinic. You can search online to find out which clinics or agencies operate in your area. You can also find some helpful ratings and reviews from expectant parents who have used those agencies and facilities in the past. Of course, you’re eager to get started, but be sure to contact and consider more than one agency rather than just going with the first search result you see.
4. Make a financial plan.
At this point, you may need to pause and assess the state of your finances. Your surrogacy attorney or fertility clinic can help you identify some ways to finance the surrogacy arrangement, or you may need to consult with a financial advisor about your options to cover costs.
5. Tell your story.
Once you have the funds available and are ready to move on, your agency may ask you to write a letter or create a profile of yourself and your partner. Tell your story, explain your situation and your desire to have a child, and include any expectations you have of a surrogate mother and your journey with the surrogate mother. This profile information helps the agency match you with a surrogate.
6. Keep learning.
You’ve probably done a lot of research and heard a lot of facts at this point, but don’t exhaust yourself. Keep researching and learning more about gestational surrogacy. That knowledge will help you feel more confident and secure as you go along.
7. Get to know the surrogate.
Not everyone wants to meet the surrogate mother who will be taking their child, but it is a good idea to have a face-to-face meeting to help determine if everyone is compatible. Discuss any expectations and concerns you have. Whether you’re working with an agency or looking for a replacement independently, be sure to include an in-person meeting as part of the process.
8. Write a surrogacy agreement.
With the help of an attorney who practices reproductive law, design a surrogacy agreement that covers every part of the surrogacy journey, from surrogacy testing and IVF to pregnancy and delivery. Having a written agreement not only protects your rights but also protects the gestational surrogate mother. It is important that the agreement is detailed and specifies the rights, obligations and expectations of each party. Some issues to consider include the purpose of the surrogacy arrangement, where the child will be born, dietary concerns, selective reduction, expectations after the child is born, fees and expenses, who is responsible for paying fees and expenses, life insurance, health insurance and court procedures to place the names of the intended parents on the birth certificate. Your attorney can help you structure a fair and reasonable settlement that protects your rights.
You now have the financial plan, the attorney, the agency, and the surrogate lined up. Remember to keep your reproductive attorney informed of key developments in the process and get their expert advice for any additional settlements and proceedings. With successful IVF treatments, your baby should be on the way soon!