I believe that one of the most valuable gifts we can give ourselves is the freedom to be our authentic selves. There are many points of discussion about what is the authentic myself?
Some may say it’s the freedom to be whatever you want to be…
Others say it is being aligned with the soul and being that soul on earth. without conforming to the pressures and typical uniformity of society…
And there are others who say that being the authentic myself it is being true to one’s inner impulses at any time.
I tend to think that being you authentic myself is to be what you think this means to you – and take responsibility for the consequences you have created by living life as this me.
I also believe that being your Authentic Self means being who you are meant to be and not trying to be someone else.. There are too many imitators out there who are completely compromising their own values, desires, tastes, unique purpose, and mission. Mind you, it takes courage to be you authentic myself sometimes because it may not be what you want to be, from an ego perspective.
The freedom to be authentic is a process — the process is the price to be paid. It’s not cheap due to the many hidden lessons and challenges, but going through the process is very rewarding.
Here are three steps toward building your freedom toward your authentic myself:
1. Like yourself.
We all know that we have to love ourselves, that’s a fact. And we’ve read enough self-help books that teach us why and how to love ourselves.
But I think the biggest challenge really is LIKE ourselves. When we don’t like ourselves, it’s like being in the same room with someone we find offensive and we try to avoid making eye contact, and we don’t want to be in the same space as the person.
When we don’t like ourselves, we avoid looking at what we are doing in our lives and live in denial of what really makes us happy. When we don’t like ourselves, we accept what others say and do as our own truth because we have stopped listening to what we truly like and love. When we don’t like ourselves, we may not even know it; Surely this is challenging unless we are prepared to practice self-awareness and internal introspection.
2. Accept your path/life without comparison.
One of the fatal mistakes people make is feeling like a victim on their chosen path. I have heard people complain about their path and start comparing themselves to others. The temptation to follow someone else’s path becomes inevitable when one is unhappy with oneself. And so they live in the detour.
To be true to oneself, it is necessary to work within, to move through inner transformation and one’s true path will be revealed and inner passion and fire will fuel all actions one undertakes.
3. Accept your flaws and make them work for you, instead of against you.
I think that human beings in general are afraid of seeing their own flaws. They think that admitting their own shortcomings is a failure.
The reality is admitting your own shortcomings and being brave enough to see them take courage. The more one tries to cover up their flaws, the more obvious they become. But if a person isn’t obsessed with his flaws, but is willing to admit them and see them for what they are, one’s flaws can easily become a strength. For example In my own story, there was once a lady who knew I was heavily dependent on alcohol before I became a spiritual teacher/mentor, she ‘threatened’ to expose me by labeling me a fraud. She intentionally didn’t want to hide my past history, but I realized I had to ‘put myself out there’ and share my own history before she did!
And it worked for me, it became my strength, it actually gave me credibility as people saw that I had been there and done that and knew what I was talking about in the area of being a transformational coach! Ironically, this lady taught me the importance of being myself!
The most important thing about being your Authentic Self is that it gives you a sense of freedom that nothing else in the world can give you, and you certainly can’t buy this freedom.
© 2013 Shamala Tan