Finding your self worth through self awareness
· As a spiritual writer, I have chosen self-awareness and inner growth as a focus for my writing. I am committed to learning from others and do my best to put at least some of what I have learned into practice in my own life. I believe what Neale Donald Walsch has said: “Words can help us understand, but experience lets you know.”
· It is my particular interest to create a mind-heart integration whereby I understand who I am through the removal of any emotional blocks that may be in my way. I have spent several years doing just that. Learning to listen to your heart is a valuable creative resource. There is much to learn.
If you listen closely to many spiritual teachers, such as Paul Bauer, Susan Castle, Gregg Braden, Dr. Dov Baron, Lynne McTaggert, you will hear each one mention how important it is to complete our emotional healing or cleansing. They may not stop at it, but they recommend it before working with others, before trying to find our life partner, make intentions, or just find our true voice, our authentic self.
· Writing and speaking has been a part of my life since I was a teenager… writing poems and essays, being the valedictorian of my class, a debater, a master of ceremonies, and most recently, an author and speaker. After many rejections of my writing and attending writing workshops where I was told I needed to find my voice, I stopped writing and started looking inside myself.
· Have you ever known that you need to look more deeply into what is going on inside of you? I had questions, BIG ones… Why have so many things gone wrong in my life? He knew he was repeating similar mistakes. I knew there were negative behavior patterns. I was determined to find out what was causing my negative behaviors and what I could do to change my life.
THINGS I HAVE LEARNED:
· Although you may be intelligent, competent, and successful in many areas, you may also have a negative self-image, frequently engage in negative self-talk, be perpetually busy, have many fears, repeat failed relationships, and lack focus.
That although most of the world is focused on the intellect and our outer world: this is just a reality. The other reality is our inner world which is driven by our hopes and dreams – the desires of our hearts. The inner you is activated by our own observation of it…observation of your thoughts, your emotions, and how that feels in your body. Our entire body is our subconscious and each cell has memory. Each and every cell listens to what we say about ourselves. What are you saying?
· That the longer we are silent and have most of our talk silenced… the sooner the interior will emerge. There are many meditation techniques available. Many teachers will say that it is all in the breath. Dr. Chopra suggested a short mantra recently at his presentation in Halifax, NS that we can repeat silently as we breathe… deeply “I Am”. He says that he has no karma attached.
· We need to be patient. Our progress comes and goes. Our inner vision begins to open, we have more energy and there is a growing inner space: freedom and strength are felt with moments of inspiration.
· We accept concepts intellectually and it takes much longer for the concept to come true in your heart than for us to live it naturally. If we accelerate our growth, it becomes empty, we get bored and apathetic as we are in unfamiliar territory and still identified with the ego.
Okay, so what can we do? How can we take care of ourselves?
1. If we are perpetually busy, our ego is in control. We have less energy and can even feel totally exhausted. Our body is responding to our strong emotional ties: resentments, jealousy, anger, and envy. I learned that when I released these emotional attachments and my victim status, I had more energy. How do we do that?
2. Regularly observe your internal dialogue… notice what makes you feel good, what makes you feel bad, identify where you feel that in your body through a deep and relaxed breath. Have you heard the phrase, “What you resist, persists?” So just sit with him for a while. So let it go. This is a practice that we need to do regularly.
3. Only you can observe your mind and identify what thought, smell, color and touch triggered your emotions. The very act of observing slowly shuts down your ego and your fears subside. You identify that you are in control and you can simply decide that you no longer need the drama in your life. As you cut emotional ties, you gain emotional composition and reduce your needs.
4. Improve your inner dialogue… this keeps us in the present. Once you identify where the negative feelings are coming from, you can either change them or take a program to release your programmed beliefs.
5. Ask yourself if you offer joy and hope to others or idle gossip and misery. Genpo Roshi says that, “Participating in slander and gossip is a symptom of how inadequate we feel. If we really felt whole…we wouldn’t need to fall into the trap of negative language. When we see that our own true nature is not lacking in any way Ultimately, we want to rejoice and celebrate the success and well-being of other people.”
6. How do we find our true nature, discover our innate abilities and talents? Truly knowing our self worth is often the answer to how we accept ourselves, even celebrate who we are.
There is more:
· We are not yet emotionally grounded, because our subconscious decides for us, based on our beliefs that we create from childhood experiences. A large part of our unhappiness comes from a ‘brain set’ we created in our early childhood.
We realize from our ‘Observing Self’ and meditation that we feel heavy inside. I created a metaphor that worked for me: My cages are inside and I’m not free. I learned that emotional freedom and inner peace is a process that does not happen by itself. We evolve towards freedom, as we gradually release all past influences that we interpreted as our own and that were actually distorted or belonged to someone else.
My inner work required the willingness to enter my shadow. Going there means becoming self-aware, facing the pain, understanding, and the growth it has to offer. It literally creates a wonderful inner space where there used to be guilt, shame, anxiety, and modesty.
It doesn’t take more time or money to “go there” than it does to pay emotionally and financially for the addictions we develop to food, TV, exercise, shopping, alcohol, relationships, and dieting.
Learn the wisdom of your heart. Your heart is constantly sending messages to your brain. Are you listening or are you only listening to the ego?
· You may begin to literally feel a ‘space’ opening up inside you. I started to feel lighter and develop clarity.
· You gain confidence as you discover more about yourself. Because I had less drama, I was more willing to trust my own voice and adopt a practice that suited me. I began to find my spirit… the energy of Source, which brings with it feelings of love, feelings that leave me in joy or peace. I judge less and appreciate more.
Ways:
Counselors, mentors, life coaches.
Books
· Workshops
energy workers
Spiritual groups/communities
CD/DVD
Programs (Online)
Hypnosis
Specialized Programs (Sexual Assault Programs)
webinars
teleseminars
SUMMARY
Taking care of yourself is letting your heart know that you are responding to its needs, the needs of your soul. It is self-development through self-awareness: wherever we find it. People and resources will come to you. Some will resonate with you and some will not. Trust your intuition.
Use whatever form of meditation works for you. There are many techniques and resources available.
Make the decision to choose the feelings, thoughts and actions that lead you to who and where you want to be.
Take time to learn what your purpose is. It will evolve over time and you may have more than one. For example, I can use my talent and interest in writing and speaking to carry messages from my spiritual process to share with others. The particular message may vary somewhat from group to group and over time.
· Treat yourself to a reading break, a dessert, enough time in your week to exercise.
Do whatever it takes to get in touch with your true self. Find the resources that will guide you to love yourself unconditionally.
· Understand and experience our own divinity.
Spend more time with groups that uplift you, help you discover the meaning of living from the heart.
Ask yourself regularly if what you are doing is taking you in the direction you want to go. Our activities must support who we are, where we want to be, and what we want to do.
Express love to others. Service to others can be the fastest way to be happy… giving away what you love most.